Wednesday, August 24, 2011

I got the fever....

Ok I have had the fever for a long long long long time
Just sometimes it is worse than others
Baby Fever that is.

I'm talking the kind that you feel when you see/hear/hold a baby
the kind that totally consumes your thoughts, ideas and goals in life
the kind that is staring you in the face every time you look in the mirror

I know I have talked about this before
actually lots of times
I try to keep quiet about it
I try to stay positive
but it always finds its way into my conversations
I actually feel bad about it at times, it just comes out

At this point I'm not sure what to even think anymore.
I laugh, I cry, I scream
It gets better for a short time and then it comes rushing back
worse than before

I have always wanted kids
lots of them, I mean like 5!
But after all this time of meds, tests, trying and upsets
1 will do, seriously, just 1!
That's all I ask and pray.

So until that time I will keep wishing and waiting.
Praying and Hoping.

I am so thankful for so so so many things
I am looking forward to so many wonderful things in our life
but sometimes it just feels good to vent.


Caroline and Kyle said...

keep praying! I'll be praying for you too!

Andrea said...

Aw. Erica! I will pray for you. You will be an awesome Mommy one day. Just remember he has a plan for all of us. Although it would be nice to see a blue print every once in a while.

Erica said...

Thank you so much girls :) It means alot to me.

Lindsay @ Delighted Momma said...

Awww it will happen... maybe God has a great plan for you as far as how or when you will become a Momma :)

Courtney, Jeff, Ayla & Leah said...

Listen Love. I dig when you get real! Because that is life, its messy and confusing and wonderful and stinky all at the same time. You will be a WONDERFUL mama when the time is right. No one knows when that day will be for you. But I will pray for you- its hard to have such a strong desire and not know what to do. But you are not alone remember. Kisses. PS. Loren's party totally ruled!

Ashley said...

You know I am thinking and praying for you!!!! I always have baby fever! And I always feel bad when I bring up the subject (happens a lot for me too) but I can't help b/c it just happens. Our time will come:)

Lindsay @ Aisle to Aloha said...

oh man, I could have written this myself. I know how you feel, Erica. Seriously. Definitely a test of my patience and trust in God lately. Praying for you, girl!